Making a Man Happy

As the title says it, I am going to discuss this oh-so-trivial and yet so romantic topic of making a man happy. I am neither a marriage councellor, nor a psychologist, i am not even married myself. I am a freelance model and just an ordinary gir/woman that is seeking happiness in her life. Making a man happy has been, is, and will be a central topic in my life, one I deal with, research on and meditate upon just as much as most people do with their bank accounts or their children (I own neither of these too, by the way).

I do have a relationship with a very special man, one I adore and one that completely changed my idea about the world and the way I am and want to be. Ever since I met him, I have been thinking about how to make him the happiest man in the world, giving him more and more of myself. I have made many mistakes, but I continue to learn. It is a blessing to have a man that your heart sees as SPECIAL - a blessing that many of the "independent" women will never understand. They look upon me (us?) as if we would be inferior for wanting to

As you can guess, there is no easy answers on how to make exactly YOUR man happy. But several things are essential, if you are really serious about it, that could apply to any man and in any relationship (no, we people are much more similar to each other and no, man and women are also not really different in their essence, thus peace and happiness are really, really possible).

First is - you must want it. No joke. You say, of course I do, who doesn't. But it is not quite like this. Most women want other things much stronger than making their men happy. Most women ctually want that THEY themselves are made happy by their men.

Which is different.

You have to want to be lovely. Not cool, not hot, not whatever in between. Lovely. Beauty might help you if you have it, but only it will not do the job, if you don't feel comfortable with the idea of being lovely.

A woman is lovely when she smiles, but is not overexcited, when she is emotional but not loud, when she is sexy but delicate, not vulgar (think clean jeans and white tank top against some glittery mini dress that will make most heads turn - asking themselves if you go to carneval). A lovely woman is adored but she doesn't try to attract attention.

A lovely woman will prepare dinner, tea, cocktail for her guy but without expecting that she is praised for this. She doesn't let her guy think that she is doing a big think making him happy. No matter how your is, the deepest nature of a man is to WANT to care for you, this is rooted deeply in his genes. So he is not happy seeing you tired and overworked, and even less complaining - subconschiously, for him this means that he fails in his biological mission. If you are really too tired, tell him so. Tell him that tonight you can't cook for him with love, tell him you need rest. A pizza from the delivery or a dinner at a fancy restaurant. Tell him, even if you don't get what you want, even if he may seem pissed off. Trust me, he UNDERSTANDS YOU. And for him it is much better to eat a dry sandwich with you on the couch, seeing how relaxed you are,feeling deep satisfaction that his woman is feeling good and getting what she needs, than to see you nervously washing the dishes and  It is a very good idea to tell him what you want in all situations, but only if you are able to NOT get sad if he turns you down sometimes. Remember, this is a long-term strategy that will pay off after some months of applying it. Your guy will actually remember all wishes you have shared with him (even if he turned them down at the moment he first heard them) and will actually START by himself doing things for you, fullfilling your wishes without even knowing it (he will most probably think this was his idea for you). Just smile and thank and be happy and continue sharing - delicately and not-demandingly....

Think about a geisha. A companion, a high-class courtesan. Think about an angel of flesh and blood. These images are not outdated. They do exist in reality and they are stamped in our hearts forever. We can keep them there locked or let them shine, polishing them each day with care anf patience.

And altruism gives the woman nature the deepest satisfaction, no matter how feminist our world has become - and how full of unhappy women indeed!

You decide. I hope I was helpful - with some food for the thought. All the rest is in you.

Thank you for reading my small contemplative article. As a follow-up will come some more practical advices - about your look, manner of speaking, even hobbies, to give your man and yourself happiness. Please check my profile, as this topic will be regularly updated - you are always welcome to discuss the most recent views in the psychology and tradition of being a real woman.